Poems & Musings,  Writing

Black Dog Scratching

Same old shit, different day

I’m familiar with this black dog that

Scratches at the door to be let in

Before it jumps on my back for a free ride into

My thoughts.

It’s there now, do you hear it?

I’m the one waiting with dark circles

And smeared mascara on the mattress

Like a queen of dark things

And I will not be afraid.

The door opens; I hear the claws clack as

It comes down the hall and I didn’t bother locking

The door this time

But when I see it, it’s not so big anymore

Its voice is quieter as it asks me if I’m sure

That it’s safe and that I haven’t made a mistake

Can I trust? Can I succeed?

Or do I really think I can handle it?

I say, I weave worlds with words

And I stain my hands with paint

And I said enough and changed my body

And you know what? I’ve survived before and

I’ll survive again no matter what

I’m the motherfucking Phoenix, bitch

You’re only here because you’re a bully

Sensing my good days and I have nothing to say

To you, anymore

– Sara Myriad

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